How Long Does Couples Counselling Take? What to Expect

“How many sessions will we need?” or "How long does couples counselling take"

This is one of the most common questions people ask during an individual or couples counselling consultation. And it makes sense - you want clarity, you want a plan, and you want to understand what’s ahead.

The truth: there’s no single number that fits everyone.

It depends on your starting point, your goals, what you’re working through, support you have, your time and capacity, and how much momentum you can build.

Therapy is no different from getting fit, learning a new language, or developing any new skill. Sustainable change takes repetition, practice, and time.

Someone who goes to the gym regularly sees progress quickly. Someone who goes once a month and does nothing in between will never build enough momentum to see results. Counselling works the same way.

What Determines How Many Counselling Sessions You’ll Need

Your starting point

Are things mildly strained, or are you dealing with deep, long-standing patterns?

If you are doing Premarital Counselling, we are looking at approximately 8 sessions, some couples take less, some a few more.

Your goals

Do you want a tune-up, or are you trying to rebuild connection, intimacy, and trust? Are we working on one specific issue, or you feel like we are starting from scratch?

Your commitment and energy

How much emotional bandwidth do you have right now? How much can you realistically practice between sessions?

Your obstacles

Burnout, trauma, health issues, stress, family pressure - all of this impacts progress.

Your support

Are you held and supported in your life, or are you doing everything alone?

Common Issues We Work Through

Below are typical topics that give you a sense of what a therapy journey might include. The more areas you recognize, the more sessions you’ll likely need. And it’s not one session per issue, deep change takes time.

Communication & Conflict

• Are you fighting often — or avoiding conflict completely?

• Are conflicts retraumatizing each other?

• Do you know how to compromise or repair quickly after a fight?

If conflict is a major theme, you may also find this helpful: Aftermath of a Fight.

Emotional Regulation & Connection

• Can you stay calm when your partner is dysregulated?

• Do you feel emotionally safe?

• Do you feel heard and understood?

• Are attachment patterns (anxious, avoidant, disorganized) influencing your reactions?

• Are past experiences still impacting the present?

For deeper perspective, you might also like: this blog post

Intimacy — Sexual and Non-Sexual

• Are you having fun together?

• Do you feel close?

• Do you understand your sexual wiring, and can you talk about it?

• Desire, arousal, or satisfaction issues

• Desire discrepancy (very common)

• Are the issues sexual, emotional, relational, or physiological?

If intimacy is a struggle, many couples also benefit from exploring: Companionship vs Erotic 

Betrayal & Trust

• Rebuilding after an affair

• Healing old wounds that keep resurfacing

Life Stressors

• Parenting, kids, teens, aging parents, grandkids

• Work stress, burnout, health issues, infertility

• Life transitions (pregnancy, retirement, career changes)

• Pandemic impacts, aging, physical or emotional health changes

How Long Does Couples Counselling Take in Real Life

Some couples need only a few sessions to learn specific tools or get unstuck around one issue.

Most couples work with me for 3 – 6 months.

Here’s the typical progression:

• Weekly sessions to build momentum

• Bi-weekly sessions once things begin improving

• Monthly maintenance to anchor new patterns and keep progress steady

And yes — there is homework. The work you do between sessions is often where real change happens.

The Path Forward

Turning a relationship around takes time — but it’s absolutely possible.You’ll need vulnerability, courage, and patience.You’ll learn more about yourself, about your partner, and about the patterns that keep pulling you off course.

And you’ll grow. Together.

If you’re curious whether counselling is right for you, book a free 30-minute consultation. We’ll talk about where you are, what you want, and whether this work feels right for you.